Cucumbers and Poo Books

Shortly after my first was born, there was a time when inviting people round was a big thing. It would mean I’d race frantically around the house with a baby wipe in hand, quickly dusting surfaces, cleaning the hob, putting washing away, picking up miscellaneous crap and shoving it in cupboards (I’ve been known to hide clutter in the washing machine before now), hiding reading material from the bathroom (heaven-forbid anyone know we read and poo at the same time) and spraying the house with an air freshener. I would have also had a late-night dash to the shop to buy a cucumber so your plate looked healthier. And why? Well, to be honest I’m not entirely sure why, but I think it had something to do with a misguided attempt to appear in control, to present a serene picture of domesticated bliss. I don’t know why I put this pressure on myself because let me tell you this, if you ever invite me round to yours and you’re still in your PJs, hair unwashed, ‘1,234 QI Facts to Leave You Speechless’ in the bathroom, a cracker shoved down your sofa and a blob of Play-Doh stuck to your wall, I will love you all the more for it. I will love you for showing me that it’s ok to not always have every plate spinning all of the time. So if I’m ever on my way round to yours, just relax and have a cup of tea instead. Balls to hoovering and washing up. And if you feed me cheesy puffs for lunch, I’m yours forever.


crisps bowl food



13 comments

  1. Amen to that lovely! I am the same, I have 3 boys and I still zoom about like a Tasmanian Devil with baby wipes in my hand, trying to clean before someone comes then, within 2 minutes, the little ones have smashed cake and biscuits over the house again. Utterly pointless. Thanks for joining in #BigPinkLink! Gem.xx

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    1. Haha the monkeys! let's just have a cup of tea next time! xx

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  2. haha I wish I was more like you. My friend once laughed at me as I usually use the excuse of someone coming to study up-WHILE THEY'RE THERE!!! I figure a new person in the house distracts the kids so I can tidy their toys away ha ha works for me ;)
    Thanks for linking up #MaternityMondays

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  3. People can put up with my house just the way it is! Cheese puffs are my favourites too - happy to share ;) #MaternityMondays

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  4. Ha ha ha so true and I have hidden lots in the washing basket 😂😂😂 #bloggerclubuk

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  5. Haha so funny get what you see in our house Thanks for linking to the #THAT FRIDAY LINKY come back next week please

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  6. Haha, I'll get the cheesy puffs in! Love this and so very true! I'm the same, frantically cleaning up before my friends come round, but like you if their house was a tip, it wouldn't bother me! Thanks for linking up to #ThatFridayLinky

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    1. We definitely put too much pressure on ourselves! x

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