How to prolong bedtime: The Ultimate Guide

Let’s get one thing straight. There’s a reason why Mum and Dad are so keen to get you to bed; they are clearly going to be having all manner of fun without you and this is also when the good snacks come out (the ones Mum hides in the kitchen and eats during the day, then tells you it’s a grape when you spot her chewing) so if you want my opinion, you’d be daft to miss out. So here are a few pointers to make sure you stay awake as long as humanly possible to prevent missing out.

1) Firstly, if you were planning to have a poo during the day then DON’T. Save it for bedtime.
2) Drink more between the hours of 5pm and 6pm than you’ve drank all day. This ensures you can get out of bed for a wee a further 17 times.
3) You know those burning questions you have? You know the ones… Do seahorses have willies? Can the sun get sunburnt? NOW, and I can't stress this strongly enough, is the time to ask them.
4) Remember that toy from a magazine you had when you were 2? Well this is the time to find it.
5) Climb inside your duvet cover and get stuck. Mum and Dad love that.
6) That papercut you had last month? Well, it’s starting to hurt a bit. Make sure everyone in the house knows about it.
7) And finally, if you really can’t ward off sleep any longer, make sure you’ve put all the soft toys you own on your bed as well as some plastic fruit, 3 books, a spatula and a stick so that they have to clear it all once you’re asleep. If you can’t have fun then at least have the foresight to delay theirs a bit.

Sweet dreams.

bedtime sleep

bedtime sleep funny


3 Little Buttons

35 comments

  1. I think this applies to most children, aged 0 to 11! lol #MMBC

    ReplyDelete
  2. hahaha! These sound very familiar! My youngest hates bedtime and always tries a few of these. lol #MMBC

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Haha it's like they have a secret club for prolonging bedtime tips!

      Delete
  3. This made me laugh! I often wish I was going to bed instead of my daughter so that she can do the chores instead of me!

    #MMBC

    ReplyDelete
  4. Haha! So very true. My oldest has tried every trick in the book 😂

    Thanks for sharing with #MMBC. Hope to see you next week x

    ReplyDelete
  5. My little boy used to ask to go to bed until about 3 and a half. Now we have all of these but his absolute favourite is that his blanket isn't flat. #ThatFridayLinky

    ReplyDelete
  6. OMG, you have hit all of them! It is like they are born with this instrinsic knowledge of coping themselves staright to 10pm! Brilliant! <3 #thatfridaylinky

    ReplyDelete
  7. Haha, yes our girls are pretty good at trying to prolong bedtime! Thanks for linking up to #ThatFridayLinky

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Haha they sure know how to prolong it don't they! x x

      Delete
  8. Ha Ha!! My eldest daughter is getting pretty good at all of these and whole other handful too!! Thank you for joining us at #SharingtheBlogLove

    ReplyDelete
  9. Oh yes, this is all so true! Another one is to roll over in bed a hundred times trying to get comfy before you finally cave in to sleep! Thanks for linking up with #TwinklyTuesday

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. haha very true! they eventually tire themselves out from rolling all evening! xx

      Delete
  10. HAHA! That's hilarious. And also, to add to the bed rolling comment, keep rolling and roll off the bed. If you make a loud enough thud, mum and dad won't let you go to sleep and will stay glued by you all night. Forgoing all fun and special chocolate filled snacks. Brilliant. #DreamTeam xx

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. oh yes!! Mine has tried that one too! So funny :D x x

      Delete
  11. I think my son must have read this already, and he's only 3! Advanced for his age clearly :) The bedtime poo always baffles me - so often I hear the dreaded words "done a poo mummy!" coming from his room after I've put him down. And who knew a hang nail could require immediate attention (I feel he's amended the paper cut one slightly for his own use!) Thanks for joining us at #SharingtheBlogLove

    ReplyDelete
  12. My daughter is only two and a half and I feel most of these methods are being practiced already! She loves to pretend she's stuck under the duvet when we've tucked her in. Nightmare!
    #SharingTheBlogLove

    ReplyDelete
  13. Hahah it's funny how they suddenly have to tell you every thought in their head at bedtime!! #sharingthebloglove

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. They are suddenly mini philosophers at bedtime!! x

      Delete
  14. Lol very true. My favorite is all the questions that stump us. Little minds aren't so little! #dreamteam

    ReplyDelete
  15. Ha ha, my two have managed all of these over the years and still do. Especially the toilet related ones and the burning questions. Also, my son will never tell you anything about his day at school no matter how you ask, but just as you're about to turn out the light he suddenly has to give you a minute by minute account of his whole day ��
    #SharingtheBlogLove

    ReplyDelete
  16. Hahaha love this. My daughter is just starting to do the whole delaying tactics at bedtime, starting with the potty and wanting to sit on the toilet. Can't wait for all the questions! #SharingtheBlogLove

    ReplyDelete
  17. Haha - How do they have such good memories for things they haven't seen for months?? #SharingTheBlogLove

    ReplyDelete