Monday, 6 February 2017

The Glorious Rise in 'Real' Parenting

There seems to have been a real shift in attitudes in the last few years; the rise of ‘real’ parenting. This is people telling it like it really is, stretchmarks, sleep exhaustion, cracked nipples and all. It’s a middle finger to the attitudes that preceded it. No longer are we trying or even wanting to have it all, to stay slim, be well-dressed and manicured, all the while serenely carrying our clean, perfectly-behaved children on our hips. Balls to that and it couldn’t have come soon enough. After my first baby, I once opened the door to a friend with baby sick on my chin. Plus, I never managed to get out on time. There was normally Weetabix smeared on my jeans and I sobbed for weeks that I couldn’t ‘crack’ breast feeding. I constantly felt like there was something wrong with me and I always felt like I was doing it wrong. Did everyone feel like they’d had the crap knocked out of them by 10am? This time round, with the birth of my second baby, I’ve felt that shift. Trying to look in control of every situation that arises has stopped being important. It just doesn’t seem to matter like it did anymore. I’m learning to embrace the chaos and it’s all thanks to those few honest people that shared their stories. I love seeing pictures of people post birth, bleary-eyed and delirious, wondering what the hell has just happened but not able to tear their eyes away from their new little person. I wish people could see how beautiful they really are in these moments and that their imperfections are glorious. I wish people could see that in themselves. I learnt that real friends wont judge your messy house but if they do then as long as they keep it to themselves then who cares?  I secretly salute the mums with the baby sick on their shoulders, the friends that don’t tidy their houses before we pop over and who give us cheesy puffs for lunch. This is real family life, it’s bloody hard, and if our houses look clean then it’s probably because we tidied up manically five minutes before you arrived. Be kind to yourself and be kind to others just like my father-in-law was for not mentioning the breast pad I accidentally left on his sofa after my first attempt at discreet breastfeeding! 

baby mum mother

So with the new year this is my attempt at documenting the highs and lows of our day to day lives, it wont always be pretty but it will always be honest. The blog is called Rice cakes and Raisins because there is always some in my bag for toddler-related meltdowns, down the side of sofa or squashed into the carpet! Humble rice cakes and raisins, I salute you! 



  1. I feel you! I think it's great that a few bloggers are showing this true to life parenting game. It makes you feel like you're not alone. I can't help but wonder, if we all did this, how powerful it would be! PS. Love the blog name!

  2. Thank you! I know when I had my first baby I honestly just thought I was the only one that was finding it hard so I think it's so important people are honest as it's never just you feeling that way x

  3. I love this! I love how the real parenting has finally come to the forefront and its happened just as I embarked on parenthood myself! I dont think I could have got through my darkest days without knowing that others were battling the same issues as me! #twinklytuesday

  4. I hear you! I am glad that more and more parents feel comfortable enough to share their real pictures of parenting. I look forward to reading more of yours. Thanks for sharing with #bigpinklink

  5. I am all for the real parenting. With two of them now, I have no hope in disguising it. I was just thankful yesterday when I realised that my boob had leaked due to a misplaced pad, just as I was about to open the door to an old guy delivering my car back from a service! Thanks for linking up with #TwinklyTuesday