Hiring A Divorce Lawyer? Here's What You Need To Know

If you are going through a divorce or have decided to split from your spouse, you may be feeling very bewildered and stressed right now. You might have lots of questions or be wondering about the correct papers for filing a divorce. Nobody ever imagines they will get divorced, and you might feel many mixed emotions - perhaps relief, perhaps fear, perhaps sadness - but whatever you are feeling, you need to think practically about your future, for both you and your kids.

One of the ways that you can think practically and make steps towards being done with the situation is by hiring a divorce lawyer. Many people hire their divorce lawyer too late, due to the fact that it makes the whole situation feel real, but in actual fact, it should be one of the first things you do.

You might not know what to expect from a divorce lawyer, so here are three foundational things you need to know. 

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You are on the same team
Many people wind up arguing with their divorce lawyer due to technicalities or irritations that come with the divorce process. While proceedings can be slow and frustrating, you need to remember that you and your lawyer both have the same goal in this situation. Getting angry and arguing with your lawyer will only make the divorce process slower and more arduous.

They might tell you what you don’t want to hear
Here’s the thing: you don’t always get what you want in a divorce settlement. Whether this is a financial loss or an argument over child custody, divorce settlements require compromise on both sides. This means that your divorce lawyer will be the one to bear this bad news to you - you can’t have exactly what you asked for in this case.

Your divorce lawyer and divorce solicitors will work hard to achieve the most realistic version of what you are asking for in the settlement, but these people deal with facts, not emotion. This means that the assets, childcare and other contentions in the settlement will need to be dealt with based on the reality of your relationship history and previous agreements, not on what you necessarily want at this moment.

Divorce lawyers will try to avoid court
Many divorces are settled amicably outside of court, and for all parties involved, this is the best situation. A divorce lawyer will never push for a court hearing unless there is a genuine contention on your side that needs to be put before a judge. Just because you have hired a lawyer it doesn’t mean you will wind up in court - in fact, divorce lawyers will try to avoid court.

Why is this? Because court is expensive, time-consuming and emotionally arduous for you and your family. While sometimes it is necessary to go before a judge if an agreement simply can’t be reached, this should only occur in extreme cases. Divorce proceedings can be ugly and upsetting, if not for you then for your family and children, and are best avoided. Lawyers know this, so don’t be alarmed if your lawyer tries to avoid court. That’s their job.

*Collaborative Post